How darkrooms can get you thinking…

Something I did not mention about the party the boyfriend and I attended, was that they had a darkroom there. Even more amazingly: they had two! One for singles, and one for couples, where singles (especially single men) were explicitly forbidden. There were even emergency-buttons, that when a singly men would enter uninvited, someone of the staff would come to kick the guy out. That is a huge difference between other parties I’ve been to, where single men, even when they did not touch me uninvited, could be quite annoying.

It also made me realise how much my sexuality has changed over the past time. Two years ago I was slowly getting into doing sexual things with others than my dominant of that time. We never continued that process because our D/s ended, but I still had my gangbang-fantasies*, wanted to try out a swingers-club one day, and loved acting quite exhibitionistic. The darkroom at this club, especially the couple’s one with nice beds and such, would have been wonderful to 2007-me.

I really hope I’ll get there again. At this moment I still feel as in the last paragraph of this post, and it does not seem to be changing one bit. Not even with the positive development in the bdsm-area, and the fact that kissing (with tongue!) has become a normal act again. Tomorrow I’ll see the sexologist again, and I hope we’ll start on some more practical stuff that’ll hopefully help me to continue in the right direction again, instead of just standing still.

*I’ll let you in on what is still my favourite gangbang idea. Ingredients: Me, with a blindfold, preferably in a sling, but a bed is fine too), a couple of guys I have had sex with before (I think I could get at least three guys for that category, maybe even more), my current partner, and one or two guys I never had sex with (maybe even a girl with a strap-on, that would be fun). They fuck me in random order (or let my suck their cock, like I care ;)), and I have to determine who is who, and who is/are the mystery guy(s).

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1 Response so far »

  1. 1

    Icey said,

    Good to read you are getting more and more comfortable with yourself again and all that. I’ve even seen half nekkid pictures in the recent posts you’ve made.

    Sounds like good news to me!! Yay and all that!

    PS. How’s the DVD I borrowed ya? Did you get a look at it yet?


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